Biden releases 5-gallon plastic bottle from US oil reserves

WASHINGTON — In an effort to stabilize soaring fuel prices, President Joe Biden announced Wednesday that he will order the Department of Energy to release a five-gallon plastic can of gasoline from the nation’s Strategic Petroleum Reserves. “By taking advantage of this emergency stockpile, we can ensure that if the American people run out of fuel along the roadside, they will still be able to make it to the next gas station,” Biden said, adding that the red five-gallon jug should ease the concerns of millions of commuters. who are visiting family during Thanksgiving and are nervous because they suddenly notice their gas gauges are nearing empty. Furthermore, we are currently in talks with the largest oil producing countries, including Canada, China and OPEC countries, to join a coordinated global effort that would release up to 20 additional gallons of gas. That means four more cans like this one, and hopefully the show will help keep prices low at the pump through the rest of the holiday season.” At press time, West Wing officials were reportedly in damage control mode after the capture of a local news crew.Footage of the president pulling gas from the tank of a Chevy van parked along Pennsylvania Avenue.

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